THE INFERIORITY OF MEN: Are men afraid of smarter women…?

My Sister,(who is also) My Mother…

November 6, 2006 at 4:31 am (Uncategorized)

Okodozor, K. (Nigeria) 

I lost my mother when I was 8. I was told that God loved my mother so much that God wanted her by His side. Being a small boy in the town of Nigeria with very little accommodation, I don’t have much memories of my mother. But I remember I have 9 siblings and my father had worked very hard to feed us all. If richness were measured by courtesy, tolerance and the love you have for people, then my family would be regarded as millionaire.

In the age of growing up, my siblings and I needed guidance through the thick and thin of our lives and the process of maturity that we don’t understand. They are things we don’t know, and things that we are not sure. It’s like a struggle in a dark room, when you walk or crawl or run, you’re not sure where you are heading to and what awaits you in your journey. In the end, you’ll just knock unto something, fall and cry. We can’t just simply bother out father as he thinks that this is child game, which he had no time to attend to and he had many other things to think of. True, my father has been a very good man and he has made sure that we have enough food to eat and comfortable clothes to wear. But he doesn’t have the time to cherish us with attention, love and answers to questions in our heads.

Therefore, I remember my oldest sibling, who was only 15 when she took over the duties of a mother. She has forced herself to ignore games and hanging-out with friends just to grow mature before her time. I remember she loves to eat fried beef and that is her favorite in the whole world. There are times when there was not enough beef to feed all of us. She had given up her portion to us. It wasn’t once or twice or thrice. But it was countless times that I lost count. Yet, never once she regrets it but happy to see our satisfied faces.

My eldest sister is an inspiration to myself and the other siblings. She has taught us many good things in life despite her own young age. Sometimes I doubt, does she get all the lessons in her dreams…? She was hardly out of the house, except to buy daily grocery items and to send and fetch us from school. But how is it possible that somebody young, beautiful and alone as she is can become somebody so determined, strong, mature and amazing. He actions influenced us in such ways unexplainable. She never scolds, hit or punishes us. Each time we disappoint her or hurt her feelings, she’ll just shed a few tears and look us direct in the eyes. I don’t know what magic she uses but her actions leave us feeling guilty. The guilt grows stronger when she said these words slow and soft, like the evening wind,

“I love all of you. And you know that I will never ask anything in return….”

            … …Then, she locked herself in her room, most probably crying – I don’t know because I’ve never seen what she did in her room. But I am sure of one thing, her actions made us automatically realized our mistakes, and after making up to it, we promised never to repeat.

            My senior brother is now an economist. Thank you to my eldest sister as well. He was never a serious guy. He took things for granted. Hurting people, smoking weeds and many other immoral behaviors. But my sister is the one person with the power to make him cry and regret for the negative actions – and changed him. I remember her favorite quote she used to say to us,

“We can easily take things for granted. But one day, that one little thing you’ve taken for granted, will be the thing you’ll look back in tears and pain.”

            … …All these times she had been hiding in her smiles. She had been so strong that she never cries whenever we went through our family photos and saw mother in it – we expressed how much we love mother and miss her. But I know, she cries inside. She had always taught of her tears to be her symbol of weaknesses. If only she knows that everything about her is the symbol of strength. I grew up knowing my sister as my mother. In the dark, in the rainy times where the storms are fierce, I ran to my sister. I can cry up to her, I can share all my pains with her and I have called her mother so many times I can’t remember. But there is one thing I never know – my sister have been listening and attending our cries for so many years now, but who has listened to her pains and her cries…?

            When it comes to a question whether a man is afraid of a smarter woman, personally, I am afraid. I am afraid not because I fear men might lost their powers and place in this world. But I am afraid because I know that men can never be like the women. I am afraid because I am impressing on the creation of women, I respect them and I know that I’ve become a successful engineer today, because a woman – my sister – had brought me up with shower of a mother’s love. And my sister is only one example – there are many more women out there who are wonderful and amazing.